Although....
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Posted:Aug 22, 2019 6:30 am
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 4:16 pm
1278 Views
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It's getting to the point where I hope a woman wants to get serious and I dread a woman wants to get serious.
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Trifecta ("Time of Your Life, Huh, ?")
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Posted:Aug 22, 2019 4:48 am
Last Updated:Aug 22, 2019 4:48 am
1456 Views
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It's a sad day: my dancer friend told me she is no longer with the strip club. After weeks of not answering my phone calls, not replying to my texts and not showing up when I ask for he at the club, she finally responds with a text accusing me of ignoring her for my new friends. (At least it's not one of her all-caps texts wanting to know IF THERE'S SOMEONE ELSE!!! Even though we've never had that conversation about where there's even a chance of it being serious between us.) Well I smoothed things over and now I guess we're friends judging by all the cartoon animals with heart eyes she started texting me.
Speaking of new friends, my latest friend-with-benefits (we shook hands on it so it MUST BE TRUE!) sent me a letter in mutli-colored marker about how valuable our friendship is. She spontaneously volunteered her interest in cult movies. She's the perfect woman for me. Other than that whole driving-while-ingesting-controlled-substances thing.
My favorite cocktail waitress in the world confirmed that this Thursday was too soon to meet up for a two-for-one buffet but the following Thursday is probable.
Oh sure, it would be fun to keep juggling three lady friends. But what if I were forced to choose?
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Still the Luckiest Dumb of a Bitch Alive
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Posted:Aug 19, 2019 11:22 am
Last Updated:Aug 20, 2019 5:56 am
1451 Views
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So my latest crush and I had a long chat this morning where she made it clear , as she has mentioned before, she is emotionally unavailable at the moment due to coming off of a devastating break-up, but what she really needs is a good friend, and there's really no one else who repays her trust at the moment.
Although...we can be the very best kind of friends.
This was a relief, because as I said on a pre-written card I handed her, I really, really want to date my favorite cocktail waitress in Biloxi (and the rest of the universe).
"Well, good for you," she said.
In the meantime, she's recovering from a bicycle accident which has left her with severe soft tissue damage in the groin area. So I told her more about my friend Alabama who had a scooter accident left her with a broken collarbone. I was treating her real gingerly until she finally snapped and said, "Dammit, Professor! My pussy's not broken!"
"Well, my pussy is definitely broken right now," she said. Wow, it's almost like she can read my mind and knew just why I was bringing this story up right now. Freaky. So, no delivery just yet of what Alabama used to receive in the way of Emergency Bedside Assistance.
Still. There's hope. Friends with benefits. We shook on it and everything.
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Dating Myself
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Posted:Aug 19, 2019 11:13 am
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 4:16 pm
1235 Views
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The toothless stripper at the Candy Store was putting on quite a show until she saw me tapping my foot to "Jessie's Girl" and said, "I figured you'd know this song."
"Screw you," I cried as she headed back towards the pole, "this song won a Grammy!"
Although I do think Rick Springfield is a little off base when he sings, "Ain't I been funny, I been cool with the lines/Ain't the way love's supposed to be?"
Au contraire, Mr. Springfield. I do not think is how love is at all.
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The Professor, Man of Action
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Posted:Aug 18, 2019 11:18 pm
Last Updated:Aug 19, 2019 4:41 pm
1520 Views
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So, apparently my latest relationship has been frustrating to everyone involved because if sex was all that important to , I should have pursued it more aggressively instead of just dropping hints and making wisecracks about it. All talk, no action, that's me. So all the crazy sex I wanted was there for the taking and all I had to do was grab it.
I haven't had to be the aggressor in a relationship for a while, though, and it doesn't come easily to me. This may be one for the "Can This Relationship Be Saved?" file.
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The Professor, Man of Action
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Posted:Aug 18, 2019 11:18 pm
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 4:16 pm
1261 Views
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So, apparently my latest relationship has been frustrating to everyone involved because if sex was all that important to , I should have pursued it more aggressively instead of just dropping hints and making wisecracks about it. All talk, no action, that's . So all the crazy sex I wanted was there for the taking and all I had to do was grab it.
I haven't had to be the aggressor in a relationship for a while, though, and it doesn't come easily to me. This may be one for the "Can This Relationship Be Saved?" file.
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The Professor, Man of Action
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Posted:Aug 18, 2019 5:59 pm
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 4:16 pm
1255 Views
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So, apparently latest relationship has been frustrating everyone involved because if sex was all that important me, I should have pursued it more aggressively instead of just dropping hints and making wisecracks about it. All talk, no action, that's me. So all the crazy sex I wanted was there for the taking and all I had do was grab it.
I haven't had be the aggressor in a relationship for a while, though, and it doesn't come easily me. This may be for the "Can This Relationship Be Saved?" file.
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Status Update
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Posted:Aug 18, 2019 7:16 am
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 4:16 pm
1264 Views
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I told Facebook I wanted to change my relationship status to "It's complicated" and Facebook told the whole world the Professor "is in a complicated relationship" which is NOT WHAT I TOLD THEM! Quit putting words in my mouth, Facebook. No one has ever said the two of us are in a relationship.
I have come to the regretful conclusion even if it wasn't someone's intent to you for a sucker, if the end result is the same, then there's no real difference.
Meanwhile, my favorite cocktail waitress in the entire world is cute, young, smart, sarcastic, and into me.
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Status Update
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Posted:Aug 18, 2019 5:56 am
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 4:16 pm
1245 Views
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I told Facebook I wanted to change my relationship status to "It's complicated" and Facebook told the whole world the Professor "is in a complicated relationship" which is NOT WHAT I TOLD THEM! Quit putting words in my mouth, Facebook. No one has ever said the two of us are in a relationship.
I have come to the regretful conclusion that even if it wasn't someone's intent to play you for a sucker, if the end result is the same, then there's no real difference.
Meanwhile, my favorite cocktail waitress in the entire world is cute, young, smart, sarcastic, and into me.
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An Ornament to Her Procession
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Posted:Aug 16, 2019 11:50 pm
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 4:16 pm
1331 Views
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I could explain how a lady came to be riding on the hood of my car like a hood ornament as I drove from the Days Inn to the Rodeway, but who would believe me?
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Fun Fact of the Day
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Posted:Aug 14, 2019 10:41 am
Last Updated:Aug 16, 2019 11:38 pm
1648 Views
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When I was living in Las Vegas, I began dating a twenty-one-year-old stripper.
Well...she turned twenty-one, eventually.
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